first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
