i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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