I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
