My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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