I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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