Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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