Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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