Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
