singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm getting married
To pizza
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
