summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He felt like a one man threesome
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
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We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
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How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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