After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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