Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
