Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
