I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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