Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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