Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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