i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
