So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
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