Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I just googled if crying burns calories
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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