Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
