The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
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