he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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