I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
so much tequila, so little girl.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
