I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
he laminated a picture of his dick.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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