ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
handjob tips. give me some.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I would fuck him just for his dog
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
