you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
