FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
you're hired as official boob wrangler
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I smell like Dick and happiness
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
