I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
That was before I lit my hair on fire
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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