i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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