Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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