I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
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