Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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