I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
