Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Your cock deserves a montage
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
