Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
You are a genius and a whore.
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