so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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