Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Randomize
