Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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