So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.