I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
