Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
