New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
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