what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
We named our party play list daddy issues
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
