In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
