Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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