Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
