I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
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