dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize