I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
