Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Randomize
